The mindful and stoic art of letting go
You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength." Marcus Aurelius
Last night I had the pleasure of attending a talk by author and Stoic expert Ryan Holiday in Rotterdam. I went because I have previously read a bit about stoicism and was surprised to see just how many philosophical similarities there are between a mindful approach to life and a stoic. I was curious to explore this overlap between eastern and western philosophy further.
One similarity between a stoic and a mindfulness practice is to get a distance from your thoughts, emotions and physical sensations. The stoics encourage us to take “a view from above”, as in stepping back and relating to what is happening to us from an outside point of view. In a mindfulness practice we also practice stepping back and observe what it is happening within us; our thoughts, emotions and physical sensations. This distance and awareness give us the power to reflect on our actions and ask ourselves if our habitual or instinctual way of reacting is beneficial for us and the people around us. Just as in the Buddhist tradition, stoics points out that we cannot control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. In other words, both traditions encourage us to cultivate awareness and wisdom, thereby knowing what is beyond our control and to let go of it. Trying to control the uncontrollable, only adds to our suffering.
When it comes to ageing, we can’t halt the march of time. Both a stoic and mindfulness teacher, will advise you to accept this fact. Of course, do what you can to keep your mind and body fit, strong, flexible and healthy, but acknowledge that what we are in control of is limited. So, what can we do with the things beyond our control? Again, the answer will be the same if you ask a stoic or a mindfulness teacher: Choose how you respond, open your mind and try to take another perspective and attitude. Being able to do this, they will also both point out, is a lifelong practice.
Holiday talked about the four virtues of stoicism: wisdom, courage, self-discipline and justice, which are ways to respond to life’s challenges and joys. I don´t have the space to get into the virtues in details here (I might get back to that in another post). But the point I want to make here is that we can cultivate certain habits of perceiving and responding to life that benefits our wellbeing. “Virtues are nouns” Holiday said. “They are something we do, not something we are”.
Last night’s talk has piqued my interest to explore stoicism more. I think there is a lot of overlap between a mindful and a stoic approach to life, but there are also a lot of ways where they differ and can complement each other. I think a mindfulness practice will help one practice the stoic virtues as it makes one more capable of seeing inner patterns of thoughts and emotions. On the other hand, stoicism might offer some practical ways to utilize the awareness a mindfulness practice gives us and help us bring it into our behaviours in everyday life.
The Stoic philosophers were old men, and it is therefore no surprise that ageing was a subject of great interest to them. Consequently, there are a lot of great Stoic quotes about ageing, so let me finish this post with one of them:
“Well we should cherish old age and enjoy it. It is full of pleasure if you know how to use it. Fruit tastes most delicious just when its season is ending. Every pleasure defers till its last its greatest delights, and even the age that stands on the brink has pleasures of its own” (Letters from a Stoic, Letter X11, 4).
Warmly, Berit